Walking Through the New Day..

My sheets are rolled into one bag, mesmerizing before and now. I was a little excited to lay in my old bedroom..childhood front yard and back house escapades. I have few things planned the next few weeks. Finish plot for my characters I have fallen in love with. Practice driving at a vacant lot.  Learn another language.

Trip took two hours preoccupying idle mind with sentinels of how driver quits smoking and that there’s firework display this weekend. Other guy bolstered same politeness by mentioning about April fiesta in the city and easy finds on apartment buildings. Masquerade of guys seated in front of the building attempted a quick chat before the long wheel drives off the curb. Yes, I’m surrounded by cowboys who will drive me and my baggage back from where I started. Exhaustion took the last of me, hammered the singled bed at my mom’s.

I woke up late in the afternoon, bothered by an intended loud bang on the door. After coffee, my sister and I shared stories of lost whereabouts.  The Blackwidow name was her idea of my odd seclusion from conventional relationships. She started with her obtuse but close to the truth assumptions. My disappearing behavior is either a passive mirror of insecurity or fear of attachment when span of attention expires in time. Maybe it’s true. I don’t have faith in people..mostly men in particular.

My email is once again crowded by strangers and marketing collateral bullshit. I replied to one job offer that doesn’t require my lazy ass to go anywhere. Phone screams non stop until I let it die on its own… My next chapter finally forms faces at work..

 

 

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Abby Mabb

Snarly female. Occasional book reviewer.

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